Houseplants and Bonsai Trees

[Sheaf]

Bit of an odd topic, but thought I'd try...

I'm trying to brighten up the now rather bare (packed the ex's stuff up) flat and want to get some houseplants. I tried buying flowers, but the fact that they die puts me off, plus it just seems wrong a bloke buying flowers for himself.... the flat needs some colour though. Pictures will be purchased, but I think plants would be good too.

I'm after a couple of tallish plants (mabe 4ft) but not wide ones. One has to go by a bookcase and not be wider. Maybe with some nice red colours in one.

I'm also thinking of getting a bonsai tree for the bedroom. Saw some in the garden centre and decided it's a must have - a proper man plant! The ones I saw varied from one with an awesome trunk but the leaves were a little big (and it was £80), to ones with small leaves but really boring trunks (about £15-£20).
I'm thinking one which is half grown for instant effect and one which is a baby that I can shape would be good. Are there any recommended tree types or any good guides to growing them? How long do they take to grow?
Anyone else attempted one? It's be on display in the bedroom, but in a place which is on full view to anyone in the hallway, so I want one that looks cool.

Also, apparently you shouldn't have plants in the bedroom... as they use O2 at night. I'm assuming one or two is ok, just dont live in a greenhouse basically right? I cant see how a little plant is going to have any significant affect on the air concentration compared to a fully grown adult exhaling loads of CO2.

[Roger Red Hat]

http://www.bonsaigardener.org/

bonsai trees are friggin awesome

[BlueRover]

bonsai trees are friggin awesome

Yes, but high maintenance. If you don't keep nipping the leaves off it will try to grow into a big tree again.

Not a good idea in a bedroom.

[MarkCoupe]

Yeah, trust me, Bonsai are soooooooooooooo hard to keep alive!! Or the two i had were anyways. Best thing you can do is ask the rents (everyones parents know about plants dont they?) , and or get down a garden centre. Im more into conrods than conservation

[Fordimus Prime]

you need to get Mr Miyagi to give you some tips:

[stefaclese]

Hang on, I thought plants give out oxygen?

I've had 5 small cactus plants (a REAL mans plant ) on the window sill in my bedrooms for 10 years now and not yet died of asphyxiation...

Thats a pretty good point I think actually, I've gone months without watering my cacti and have yet to have one die on me, even get them to flower every once in a while (although from a man point of view this is an irrelevance). Maintenance free, aggressive looking plant, can be used as a weapon...

[Sheaf]

Hang on, I thought plants give out oxygen?

Apparently they do, during the day... photosynthesis and all that. However at night they actually use oxygen.

Anyway, I was too eager and ended up going back to to the local garden centre and getting one. It didn't look that healthy tbh, but the bloke there assured me it's because it's inside and this type (chinese elm) needs lots of light. A week or so in decent light and it'll be fine he says...

Other types there were evergreen and looked better in some ways, but the shapes were boring. This one is an awesome shape -



It needs some shaping once it starts growing a bit more, but has the basic shape and good trunk, just needs to thicken up and shape the clusters.

He reckoned it's quite hardy as it's an Elm, I'll have to see I guess. It was only £15 so not like it's mega money anyway.

[empsburna]

Hang on, I thought plants give out oxygen?

I've had 5 small cactus plants (a REAL mans plant ) on the window sill in my bedrooms for 10 years now and not yet died of asphyxiation...

+1 for a cactus - got an epic one on my desk here.

[Cableguy]

Hang on, I thought plants give out oxygen?

I've had 5 small cactus plants (a REAL mans plant ) on the window sill in my bedrooms for 10 years now and not yet died of asphyxiation...

+1 for a cactus - got an epic one on my desk here.

Pics or GTFO.

[Sheaf]

See, I just find cacti boring. My parents used to have a conservatory literally full of them All sort of varieties. There must have been 50 pots in there, lots of pots with multiple cacti in. Most were just boring green lumps though. Definately easy to care for, but I'm kind of cacti'd out.

Also, definately need pics.. one of the ones in the 'rents conservatory was a huge cluster, basically ending up about 2ft wide and about the same tall. They dont have it any more though I dont think, unless it's in the garden now as they ditched most when they got a new conservatory.

[stefaclese]

So really your desire for a 'mans plant' was all an elaborate ruse to disguise the fact that you want a girls plant?

[bgunn]

Hang on, I thought plants give out oxygen?

I've had 5 small cactus plants (a REAL mans plant ) on the window sill in my bedrooms for 10 years now and not yet died of asphyxiation...

Thats a pretty good point I think actually, I've gone months without watering my cacti and have yet to have one die on me, even get them to flower every once in a while (although from a man point of view this is an irrelevance). Maintenance free, aggressive looking plant, can be used as a weapon...

Going months without watering a cacti is good, you are mimicking its natural environment - this is why they're so strange shaped with no 'leaves' to lose water while they photosynthesise. The spines are to stop them being eaten!

You'll make a cactus flower by starving it of water, they flower when they are close to death - as it makes sense to reproduce at this time, rather than 'wasting' energy flowering seasonally like a 'normal' plant will.

[Sheaf]

So really your desire for a 'mans plant' was all an elaborate ruse to disguise the fact that you want a girls plant?

Mr Miyagi is all man!

[Roger Red Hat]

Im more into conrods than conservation

fantastic quote that! going to use that next time im asked about being green and ozones.

cool topic tbh..all tho im officially annoyed at sheaf for making me want another tree! hehe

i didnt know they could grow into fullsize trees tho?..

[Vard66]

Did everyone else miss that Sheaf got the respiratory cycle of plants entirely the wrong way round right back in the OP?

Or maybe I was REALLY just not paying attention in Bio.

*Edit*

Ok, no, I missed Stef's post.

Carry on.

[radddogg]

Did everyone else miss that Sheaf got the respiratory cycle of plants entirely the wrong way round right back in the OP?

Or maybe I was REALLY just not paying attention in Bio.

*Edit*

6 Co2 + 6 H2O = 6 O2 + C6H12O6(sugar)

Did everyone miss that Vard failed to read the entire post?

[Vard66]

lol

Did Raddders miss that I edited my entire post?

[radddogg]

lol

Did Raddders miss that I edited my entire post?

Yes

[Vard66]

lol.

In fairness, I was editing as you wrote your post.

Anyway. Trees, awesome.

[stefaclese]

I wonder if ethanol can be extracted by fermenting wood from bonsai trees? Care to find out for us Sheaf?

Baaaaaaannnzzzzzaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!

[Sheaf]

As I said, plants use CO2 during the day, but actually use oxygen at night. Looking online though, it seems that they give off 10x as much during the day as they use at night, plus it's pretty dam small compared to a person, so nowt to worry about.

http://www.copperwiki.org/index.php/Oxygen_Cycle#Plants

But in order to maintain their metabolism and continue respiration at night, the plants must absorb oxygen from the air and give off carbon dioxide just as animals do. Even though plants produce approximately ten times as much oxygen during the day as they consume at night, the night-time consumption of oxygen by plants can create low oxygen conditions in some water habitats.

[Vard66]

Yeah, we ascertained that I really must not have been listening in Bio a few posts back.

Really didn't know that.

The most likely explanation is that I must've been sleeping, lulled by Dr. Chadwick's remarkable monotone voice.

So, in conclusion - Plants do 'exhale' Co2, and Vard is a dunce.

[radddogg]

Vardfail

[Chin.]

Hang on, I thought plants give out oxygen?

I've had 5 small cactus plants (a REAL mans plant ) on the window sill in my bedrooms for 10 years now and not yet died of asphyxiation...

+1 for a cactus - got an epic one on my desk here.

Pics or GTFO.

I dunno why but it just made me laugh very, very much